Thanks, 2013.

Wow, Goodness. Is this really goodbye to 2013? You've been crazy. And that's being mild.

At the beginning of this year I don't think I could have imagined how much would happen or change.
Or how much I would change. This year has be about me finding all about um, well. Me.

Change doesn't scare me anymore// I heal slowly// I'm too hard on myself// I'm a introvert and extrovert// People's words and actions do mean too much to me// I'm a perfectionist, but I'm learning to deal with it// I'm not shy anymore// I will stand up for myself// I'm very sensitive// I'm scared of relationships// I'm blunt// I'm forgiven// I'm not the girl I was last year at this time// I'm not sure what I'm going to do with my life yet and that's OK//

This year was also about Adventure and first times...

I traveled to Prince Edward Island// Danced in front of thousands of people on stage// Got asked out for the first "real" time// Traveled to the UK// Hosted two civil war balls// Went to NC for my sister's graduation// Went to my first prom// Joined choir// Road tripped to Kentucky// Was in drama club// I got my drivers license//

This year has also shown me God in a new way. God has shown me so much this year...

I've learned to give my fears to The Lord// My lord when never forsake me or forget me// He's got my back// His love is utterly amazing// Saving grace and changing grace// I would be so lost without God// God's burden for the lost is heart breaking//God has been showing me how to love and to love undying// Prayer can change anything and everything// 

If i was going to give this year a name i would call it //the year of grace and love//  

This year has be strange and exciting! 

So much amazing stuff has happened this year, I'm totally stoked to see what Gods going to do in my life this coming 2014. 

Thanks, 2013 for changing me and preparing me for what 2014 has in store for me.

Later, 2013.

Love,

Hannah <3

//p.s. I hope y'all have a wonderful new years eve and a happy new years!//

Civil War Christmas Ball 2013

Every year my family host an annual civil war christmas ball and every years it's a magical evening and this year was no exception. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, So here are some pictures to say what i don't have time to write.

Rachel, Charity and I.

Pretty Dresses!

Dancing away.

My Mum, calling the dances.

My Brothers. lol

He looks happy, doesn't he! ;)

Besties <3

Siblings and friends <3

A Wonderful evening was had by all. I loved to see all the lovely dresses and be jolly with my dear friends and family. 

Can you believe tomorrow is Christmas? ah. Well, I'm off to wrap some gifts.
Have a jolly, holly Christmas eve.

Love,
Hannah <3

17.

Today marks the day of my birth. 

17 years ago.

December 11th, 1996

I'm not going to bab on and on about how I can't believe I'm 17 or how bitter sweet it is. because sitting here on my bed, drinking tea, I feel strangely OK. OK with the fact that 16 is over and that strangely I can believe I'm 17. 

16 was crazy, I loved and hated it. 

But, I'm kinda glad it's done. 

For the longest time, I've held on to my youth afraid to grow up. But here and now I'm OK with it. I'm actually excited for the New Year, for change.

16 was also the hardest yet.

Half of what I went through no one knows or ever will know. But God was always there. And I think that was one of the most important things I learns my 16th year.

I'm so excited to see what people I will meet, the places I'll go and the adventures I'll have my 17th year!

Well, here's to 17.

Please be good. 

Now i'm off to have coffee with a friend and then eat cake and be merry with my family! :)

Love,

Hannah <3

A Tea Party To Remember.

I'll always remember this evening for the laughter and I'll always smile when I think about all my lovely friends who will share this memory with me.

We:
Laughed like idiots
Drank tea
Talked about boys
Sang
Ate cucumber sandwiches
Shared long hugs
Spent the night in a mansion (Cool, right?)
Danced
Talked like British Nanny's
And were merry...

and I can't think of a better way to spend my evening.

Love these girls! <3

I want to say a big thanks to my mum for helping me get everything ready for my birthday tea/slumber party.

Well, I can't believe that on the 11th i shall be 17. time sure does fly, when you're having fun!

Love, 
Hannah <3

In a vicious world, i will calm your soul.

I'll never leave you. I'll never forsake you.
In a vicious world, i will calm your soul.
I'll never leave you. I won't forget you.

These few words are some I've dearly longed to hear.
I've always wanted that one person to say "I'll never leave you."
I want to be loved, to be missed and wanted.
I've always dreamed about someone loving me so much that they would do anything for me.  Someone whom even if i walked away from them would say "I'm not giving up on you."
You could say i have a very high expectation of love.
And i think because of this i have let my heart chip so many times, trying to find a undying love.
there are people i poured my heart into and would have died for and have simply just walked away from me... 

I could go on but, I'll just cut to the chase.

The truth is, No person can love me like this.
The love i long for isn't of this earth.
In these last few months i realized that God is the only one whom will never leave me or forsake me. even after so many time of turning my back on him, he was there saying "I'm not giving up on you." 

I'm not saying that people won't love you and never leave you, but that's your going to waste a lot of time searching, if you're trying to find a love like God's from other people.

My lord, is the only one whom can love me like I've longed for.
so I'm done trying to find "undying love" because I've already found it.

So God, thank you. that In a vicious world, You will calm My soul. and You will never leave Me or forsake Me. and You won't forget Me. 

Love,
Hannah <3
  
thanks, my dear blogger friends. for listening to my late night thoughts and ramblings! And thanks for the birthday wishes! It was a wonderful birthday!! :) 

Simple Thanks

I'm thankful for:

My family, Without them I would be nothing.

God and his mercy. 

Courage to say I'm sorry and I forgive you.

Music that moves your heart.

My friends, People who want to be with me. 

Love. 

The mending of a broken heart.

Change, even tho I hate it sometimes.

The future and the hope of things to come.

Second chances.

Watermelon.

Linking arms with friends. 

Being able to talk to the maker of heaven and earth.

Mustaches.

That God saves my tears in a jar and not one tear falls that God does not remember.

Some of these things may be simple and even dumb, but man. Am I thankful for them. 

Love,

Hannah

11/25/13

I think everyone thought we were crazy when we acted like girly girls and sang our hearts out to 1D or that time we stayed up till 4am saying things only we will ever know. 

But no one will ever know how we snuck out on your roof and talked about the future like we had a clue or when we planed our move to London. I'm sure they would laugh if they ever saw us dance to the best song ever.

I tend to laugh when I think about prom and you know why. I always smile when I think about that starry night that we snuggled under our blankets and swayed to the music under the open sky and I'm pretty sure they laughed as we swayed to the music in time. 

But they can laugh, Because...

They'll never know about when we snuck down to that cold basement and screamed murder and quickly ran away or at 3am when we prayed and I felt a tear and that chilly night we laid on your lawn and wished upon the stars.

I know times have come when we almost lost it all. But I love happy endings to much for that. And as a wise person once said, you're stuck with me for life.

So I hope when you think Anne and Diana, you think US. 

~~~

Today shall always hold a soft spot in my heart. This day may mean nothing to anyone else , but I shall never forget. <3

Love,

Hannah 

Sky's sill blue

Hello Lovelies! So I'm a pretty happy Girl today! I got my t-shirt from Andrew Bell! (aka, My favorite singer everrrrrr)

//I'm here to share with Y'all a song that touched me.
listen to the lyrics 
feel the music 
and let it touch your soul.///

Ya never see clearly, til ya stop crying
I never found it, until I stopped trying
I stumbled upon ya and fell thru the ceiling tiles
I started a fire, to smoke out my treason's
I tore down a building, to pick up the pieces
And now on a clear glass wall, I can see our fate
But it's a little too late

Oh If you're hearing this
I musta made it through
Oh when the clouds above open up through my window
I'll see the sky's still blue

Ya never hold onto, what we believe in
I think I've lost ya, tell me I'm dreaming
Why do we wait to live, til we begin to die

I made the incision, I begged and I borrowed
I traded my vision, for heartache and sorrow
But now that I've found my sight
I finally realize, I was born to go blind

Oh If you're hearing this
I musta made it through
Oh when the clouds above open up through my window
I'll see the sky's still blue...

///Oh if you're hearing this, I musta it through///
 ~Hannah <3

type of girl..

I'm the type of girl who pulls into a dirt road and rolls down her windows down just to feel the bitter wind upon her hand, with one hand on the wheel and one out the window, i would listen to the music as the trees with their bright colors and glow, sway in time.
I waved at everyone who passed me and I'm sure they must have laughed at my merry smile. But i would be to into the beauty of the trees and the melody of the music to care. 

I'm the type of girl who likes to take a minute to get by myself and to admire the little things and to be free. 

Love,
Hannah <3

Today I am

Today I'm Happy.
I'm just so grateful that God closes some doors and opens others. but I'm also grateful that sometimes God closes a door for a time and then reopens it. :) I'm grateful for the sentence "Forgive and Forget." I'm very glad to hear a laugh today i thought I'd never hear again. I'm very, very grateful that the maker of the stars is taking care of my present and future.

Today I smile, Simply because I'm happy. 

Love, Hannah <3

H's From October.

Healing up these wounds from the past and letting God heal my Heart.

Hoping That maybe you're still out there and that you care.

Holding on to everything so tightly, but then learning to let go.

Having friends who hug you and letting you know you are loved.

Haunting silhouette that i must forgive and forget.

Hurting is of the past.

Happily living my life everyday with a smile.

Love,
Hannah <3